Maturity: What Is It, Really?
Earlier today, I was having a casual chat with some friends, which, as usual, spiralled into one of our classic debates. The topic? Maturity. It started off light, but you know how these things go—next thing you know, we're philosophising about life, throwing in examples from Warren Buffett, and questioning our entire existence.
The burning questions on the table were: What actually is maturity? How do you know when you’ve got it? Does it have anything to do with age? And, for some reason, we had to tackle the age-old (no pun intended) question: who’s more mature, men or women?
I thought back to when I was younger. I was that kid who just had to argue every point. I remember constantly debating with my mum, determined to make her see things my way. If I had an opinion, I was going to make sure everyone heard it—loudly. Now? Well, these days, I smile, nod, and save myself the headache. Why get into an unwinnable argument when I can just let things go? Does that mean I’ve matured? Or did I just learn that peace of mind is priceless?
Anyway, one of my more philosophical friends—chimed in with a bold claim: "You’re never fully mature until you’re on your deathbed, reflecting on life." Naturally, he brought up Warren Buffett. Apparently, Buffett said his biggest regret was not spending more time with his loved ones during his younger years. Abdullah’s point was that it takes a lifetime to really figure out what’s important, so you can’t call yourself truly mature until the very end.
Now, I’m not sure I buy that argument. Sure, looking back on your life might give you some final pearls of wisdom, but does that mean you weren’t mature until that moment? I think maturity happens along the way, not all at once in some grand epiphany at the end. Besides, if we only become mature right before we kick the bucket, what’s the point? Is the prize for maturity a “well done” just as we’re checking out?
Can You Be Old and Immature? Can You Be Young and Mature?
Spoiler alert: yes, and yes. We've all met that 50-something-year-old who throws tantrums over the smallest things and the 20-year-old who handles life’s ups and downs with grace and poise. So, maturity clearly isn’t just about age. It’s not like you hit a magic number and suddenly, poof, you’re enlightened.
We did what any self-respecting group of friends does when we can’t agree—we turned to Google. And we landed on this definition: maturity is being developed and balanced in your personality and emotional behaviour. Sounds fancy, right? But what does that even mean?
What Makes You “Balanced”?
The answer, as it turns out, is fairly simple: experience. The more you live through, the more opportunities you have to learn and grow. Life throws curveballs, you figure out how to handle them (or at least survive them), and each time you get a little bit wiser, a little bit more “balanced.”
That said, not every experience automatically makes you more mature. We all know someone who keeps making the same mistakes over and over without learning a thing. If you don’t reflect on what you’ve been through, you’re not going to gain much. So really, it’s not just experiences that matter—it’s what you do with those experiences.
The Million-Dollar Question: Who’s More Mature—Men or Women?
Ah, here we go. The debate that never dies. Who’s more mature? Men or women? Naturally, this came up in our discussion, and we all braced ourselves for the inevitable standoff.
Now, studies do suggest that women tend to mature faster than men, particularly during those teenage years. But is this always the case? Of course not. Maturity is so individual that it’s impossible to say one gender is more mature across the board. I know men who are far more emotionally intelligent than some women I’ve met, and vice versa.
In reality, it comes down to life experiences, personal growth, and—this might surprise some people—self-awareness. How well do you know yourself? How well do you handle situations that push your emotional buttons? That’s the real measure of maturity, in my opinion.
Conclusion: It’s Not Black and White
Here’s the thing: maturity isn’t something you just “get” one day, and it’s definitely not one-size-fits-all. You can be mature in one aspect of your life—let’s say, your career—but completely immature in others, like handling relationships or conflict. It’s all about where you’ve grown the most based on your personal experiences.
So, what’s the takeaway? You get to decide which areas of your life you want to grow in. It’s not about achieving perfect maturity, because let’s be honest—that’s not a thing. The goal is to keep learning, keep growing, and keep evolving as life goes on. There’s no rush, and there’s no finish line.
In the end, maturity isn’t about never making mistakes—it’s about what you do after those mistakes and how you move forward. So, you choose: what parts of life do you want to be more mature about, and what parts can you still afford to laugh off?
Comments